Even if you’ve never tuned into The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, the Hulu reality series documenting the lives of nine Utah women who initially rose to fame via TikTok, you’ve probably seen its stars’ faces and side gigs. And you’ve almost certainly come across a whole lot of headlines — like the brouhaha surrounding cast member Taylor Frankie Paul, whose stint as The Bachelorette came crashing down this month amid allegations of domestic violence.

But the drama isn’t limited to Paul. Within weeks of the show’s Season 4 premiere on March 12, the Utah crew has been rocked by surprise divorce filings, spicy Call Her Daddy reveals, rumored cast feuds and smooches with castmates’ former spouses. Now it’s all anyone in the group chat can talk about. Feeling lost and left out of the convo? Here’s how to get caught up.

But first, some #MomTok background …

#MomTok refers to a group of Mormon-ish moms and influencers living in Utah who found fame on TikTok in 2020 by sharing lifestyle content — parenting, marriage, humor, etc. — and filming choreographed dances. The group gained major attention in 2022 after a viral scandal revealed that some members were involved in a “soft swinging” arrangement, sparking debates about relationships, religion and authenticity.

As the drama unfolded online — fueling friendship breakups, accusations and shifting alliances — audiences became invested in both their personal lives and the group dynamics. This ongoing attention turned #MomTok from a loose social media circle into a recognizable internet phenomenon.

It's built-in audience and real-life drama eventually led to the creation of a reality TV show that capitalized on the intrigue and existing fanbase. The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives premiered on Hulu in 2024 and has already had four seasons. But the scandals among the group continue to unravel when cameras are down.

Who do I need to know about?

Taylor Frankie Paul 

Who is she?

Paul is widely considered the leader of #MomTok and is easily its most controversial figure.

The mom of three was at the center of the “soft-swinging” scandal that first propelled the group into reality TV notoriety (it also led to her divorce from ex-husband Tate Paul). She rebounded with her on-off boyfriend Dakota Mortensen (father of her 2-year-old son, Ever), a rocky relationship that saw Paul being arrested in 2023 following an altercation at home. She pleaded guilty to aggravated assault and was sentenced to three years of probation, which ends this August.

The arrest didn’t hurt Paul’s career — at least initially. Footage of the incident was included in the Secret Lives of Mormon Wives series premiere in September 2024, and Paul’s “sinner” amid “saints” rep and unfiltered honesty made her reality TV gold. That led to her being announced as the lead for Season 22 of The Bachelorette, marking the first time the ABC franchise (which, like Hulu, is owned by Disney) chose someone outside of Bachelor Nation.

TL;DR on her Season 4

Paul filmed Season 4 of SLOMW before departing for production on The Bachelorette. It seemed clear, however, that Paul wasn’t exactly ready to start dating 20+ men while cameras rolled. She repeatedly reconnected with Mortensen, and her castmates suggested she reconsider the Bachelorette gig and prioritize her mental health. Paul decided to proceed with the ABC show anyway.

What’s the latest? 

Fast-forward to February, when Paul and Mortensen became embroiled in another alleged domestic violence investigation, halting production of SLOMW’s fifth season. Paul continued promoting her upcoming season of The Bachelorette, but another bombshell was soon to drop: On March 19, TMZ released footage of her and Mortensen’s 2023 altercation, reigniting scrutiny of both the earlier incident and the newer allegations. Mortensen filed for a protective order against Paul, with a scheduled hearing set for April 7.

By now, you know that Paul’s season of The Bachelorette never ended up airing; the network pulled the show days before its March 22 debut in response to the fallout.

There was more to come: On March 24, the West Jordan Police Department confirmed it was investigating a third alleged domestic violence incident after Mortensen submitted video evidence believed to have been filmed sometime in early to mid-2024.

Despite the drama, Paul hasn’t shied away from social media — most recently posting a note to her Instagram Stories about attending a Joe Dispenza healing retreat.

Jessi Draper 

Who is she?

The woman behind the Utah curl, thanks to her work styling the cast’s hair through JZ Styles Salon & Hair Extensions. She joined the show under her married name, Jessi Ngatikaura, but reverted to her maiden name ahead of Season 4. Viewers of Season 3 could see why; the relationship drama — alleged emotional abuse on his part, an emotional affair on hers — between her and husband, Jordan Ngatikaura, played out onscreen.

TL;DR on her Season 4

Though officially still together, conversations about divorce were captured on camera. Draper hesitated to separate after learning their prenup might not be finalized, which could threaten her company and finances as the family’s sole provider for the past three years.

Meanwhile, Ngatikaura attempted to launch #DadTok — the dad’s counterpart to #MomTok. A few of the men participated in making videos as a group, but, spoiler alert: it didn’t catch on.

What’s the latest? 

On March 19 — yep, the same day as TMZ’s damning Paul drop — Ngatikaura officially filed for divorce. He also requested a temporary restraining order, which was denied. TMZ (a recurring character here) broke the news of the filing before Draper even knew about it, she claimed in an interview for Alex Cooper’s Call Her Daddy podcast, which aired on March 25.

She also addressed the filing during that conversation, which was recorded on March 20. Draper claimed that Ngatikaura had been emotionally abusive throughout their relationship, alleged he previously used an escort service (before her admitted affair) and clarified that their prenup is in fact valid. She also mentioned her plastic surgery regrets.

Then the rumor mill kicked up again. Last Thursday, reports surfaced that Draper had already moved on from her marriage, sharing a smooch with Chase McWhorter. If that name sounds familiar, it’s because he is her fellow SLOMW castmate Miranda Hope’s ex-husband. Hope confirmed the rumors on Friday, and everyone grabbed their collective popcorn.

Chase McWhorter

Who is he?

Not a wife, but very much a part of the chaos. McWhorter is Miranda Hope’s ex-husband and a cast member tied to the original swinging scandal involving Paul and her ex-husband. McWhorter and Hope — who share two kids — announced their divorce in 2024, though it hasn’t yet been finalized.

TL;DR on his Season 4

McWhorter inserted himself into nearly every argument and filmed TikToks with Paul (with whom he previously hooked up). His brother, Mason McWhorter, also got in on the SLOMW action, joining the show as Layla Taylor's boyfriend. The brothers have more than reality TV and DNA in common: Taylor revealed she’d hooked up with Chase in the past.

What’s the latest?

Draper is now the third of Hope’s friends to get involved with McWhorter. Hope hinted as much when she posted a photo of apology flowers from Draper to her Instagram story on Thursday. She later said McWhorter had told her about the kiss and that she felt slighted by her friend.

On Friday, Hope posted a video to Instagram, writing, “GRWM while I process my friend group being a waiting room for my ex-husband.” Or, as she put it more bluntly in the caption, “It’s not even a betrayal at this point, it’s a tradition.”

Mikayla Matthews

Who is she?

One of the younger faces in the #MomTok orbit, Matthews has been part of the group since its early TikTok days. She’s also been one of the more vulnerable cast members on SLOMW, frequently opening up about her chronic health struggles and marriage to husband Jace Terry.

TL;DR on her Season 4

Matthews and Terry spent much of the season navigating a painfully honest conversation about intimacy. Matthews revealed that her history of sexual abuse, combined with the toll of her autoimmune disease, made the pressure of maintaining an intimate marital relationship overwhelming.

The pair ultimately decided to take that pressure off entirely by announcing their separation while they figure out what their relationship actually looks like moving forward.

What’s the latest?

The separation raised plenty of eyebrows among fans, but the current status of the relationship is… unclear.

Matthews has hinted that she and Terry may no longer be living fully separate lives, though she’s been intentionally coy about confirming whether they’re officially back together. For now, it seems the couple is somewhere in the gray area between separation and reconciliation — which, in the world of #MomTok relationships, might actually be the most stable place to be.

Matthews has shared that she and the pair’s four children have moved to California for her health.

Whitney Leavitt vs. Jen Affleck

Who are they?

Two #MomTok personalities (and Dancing with the Stars alums) who were once firmly in the same corner — until they weren’t.

Leavitt and Affleck’s friendship has unraveled into one of the show’s more chaotic feuds, fueled by social media subtweets, competition and, of course, their husbands getting pulled into the drama.

TL;DR on their Season 4

What started as a simmering disagreement escalated into a full-blown falling out. The women clashed over loyalty within the group and who was stirring the pot behind the scenes.

Naturally, their husbands, Conner Leavitt and Zac Affleck, didn’t stay out of it. Instead, they became active participants in the drama. Zac showed up to confront Whitney in place of Jen during a filmed meet-up, leading to a heated argument and a call-out from Conner. Whitney’s husband remains a fan favorite for standing up for her. Zac, not so much.

What’s the latest?

The tension between Leavitt and Affleck still hasn’t fully cooled off. At this point, the feud feels less like a temporary spat and more like another permanent fracture within the #MomTok ecosystem — which, as we’ve learned, rarely resolves cleanly.

Leavitt is well on her way to superstardom after a successful DWTS season and her current record-breaking run as Roxie Hart in Chicago on Broadway. Affleck, meanwhile, is said to be part of a rumored SLOMW West Coast spinoff after moving to California.

Layla Taylor

Who is she?

Taylor has been one of the more emotionally open members of the group, often sharing the less glamorous side of influencer life, from divorce to single motherhood to the pressures of Utah beauty culture.

TL;DR on her Season 4

Her storyline this season centers on body image, as she revealed that she had been misusing GLP-1 weight loss medications while struggling with disordered eating and body dysmorphia. At one point, she shared that she weighed just 99 pounds — a number that shocked both viewers and her castmates.

The conversations became some of the season’s most vulnerable moments, as Taylor spoke candidly about how deeply her self-worth had become tied to her appearance and the pressure to stay “perfect” online.

What’s the latest?

Outside the show, Taylor’s personal life has been just as turbulent. In February, she confirmed that she and her boyfriend, Mason McWhorter, had broken up after nearly a year of dating.

She told US Weekly that she’s no longer on GLP-1 medications and is seeking treatment at an outpatient facility.

Did I miss anyone? 

Yes — though castmates Mayci Neeley (another key #MomTok member) and Demi Engemann (who was at the center of Season 3’s drama) have been mostly flying under the radar lately. (And more power to them.)

Engemann was tied up in a lawsuit, was subject to rumors about her relationship with her husband Bret and gave the pop star life a shot. But her involvement in Season 4 was limited, considering she refused to take part in any confessionals.

As for Neeley, she’s largely considered the peacekeeper among the group. If you want the scoop on her, there’s her memoir for that.

Will #MomTok survive this?

If there’s one question hovering over the latest SLOMW headlines, it’s the same one fans have been asking since the very first soft swinging scandal blew open: Will #MomTok survive this? Then again, what exactly is this anymore?

And honestly, who knows? Season 5 is currently in limbo after production was halted, and it’s unclear when — or if —filming might resume. But if the last few weeks of headlines have taught us anything, it’s that the #MomTok drama keeps rolling, even when the cameras are not.